Listen to another culture, see from another perspective

This week, psychologists Nora Rubí and Julen Chato finished their volunteer work at Casa de la Mujer (Women's Center). After three months supporting psychosocial guidance for victims of gender-based violence, they tell us about their experience.

They participated in a call for applications from the Haurralde Foundation in Spain, where, after several selection processes, they were chosen as volunteers and subsequently assigned a surprise country. In their case, it was Bolivia.

Although the cultural adaptation was not easy at first, both agree on the contributions of the experience to their professional and personal development, and on the satisfaction of having left something in the women they cared for.

Julen Chato, for his part, was in charge of providing psychological first aid and support before the women were referred to legal or psychological services. “Many of them arrive feeling isolated, sometimes for many years, and they need to be heard. Some don't have family or friends; they are completely alone.”

Furthermore, Julen highlights the fact that the legal and psychological service is free and open, as this makes Casa de la Mujer the first or last option for many women who are experiencing situations of violence and do not have economic resources.

“Some have already been through the Ombudsman's Office or the FELCV (Special Force to Combat Violence against Women) and come here because they know it's a place where they can get help,” says Julen. “That's why having this option and keeping it going would be very beneficial.”

As volunteers, another of their commitments was to support the development of a project to seek funding, which would allow for the economic sustainability of legal and psychosocial care.

Gratitude that goes both ways

On her last day of work, Nora Rubí received visits, calls, and messages from several patients and their children. It hadn't been easy listening to so many powerful stories in such a short time, but seeing the women's gratitude, their well wishes, and their willingness to talk until the very last minute, she felt it had all been worthwhile.

Nora Rubí, who also volunteers for the Red Cross in her country, believes that volunteering is a way of both receiving and giving. “You receive other ways of seeing and thinking from a completely different culture.” And at the same time, you contribute other ways of doing things.

“When someone is caught up in a problem,” Nora says, “it’s difficult to see possible solutions objectively. When you’re on the outside and have a broader perspective, it’s possible to make valuable contributions.”

Her time at Casa de la Mujer gave her insight into some cultural aspects that exacerbate the problem of gender-based violence. She was particularly struck by the fact that, in some cases, victims are not supported even by their own families.

“At a social level, there is a lot of pressure when deciding whether to end the relationship; it seems like everyone is going to talk or criticize. The woman feels a lot of pressure in the sense that she thinks: ‘he’s your husband, you have to put up with it’.”

Another problem she noticed is that many times staying in a violent situation is justified for the sake of the children, when "for the children it is much worse to be in that situation than for the parents to separate; because they are seeing a scenario in which they assume that it is natural for there to be violence within the family."

That's why it's important that psychosocial support is present in these cases.

"It is necessary for the victim to feel supported, heard, and understood, because normally, when trapped in cycles of violence, they feel guilty, as the abusers make them believe that they are the ones who create those situations. All those thoughts must be dismantled. Making them aware that they have been victims is fundamental for them to be able to get out of that situation and prevent it from happening again in the future."

Nora and Julen returned to the Basque Country to continue their careers.